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danapunzo66

My Back Was Had

Updated: Apr 29, 2023

Body-Based Work Is The Key That Relieves Past Experiences In The Body


Yoga teacher training has given me the psychological and physical push and pull that has caused me to find balance.

One challenge that I grappled with was doing a pinca mayurasana (forearm balance). It seemed nearly impossible. I could feel myself being pushed down under the weight of my thoughts and it brought back memories of childhood.

***


"Tag, you're it!"


Playing tag with the neighborhood bullies on the cul-de-sac where I lived during my childhood was only the beginning of me having to watch my back.



The force of her anger, both hands against my back, caused me to skid across the pavement, the gravel embedding itself into me. Looking behind my shoulder, I could see her face. Happy, almost. Fear and anger filled me, seeing the satisfaction in her eyes. I don't know if I was more concerned about being hurt or about how deliberate her action was.


I could still feel the push when I had to sit for what felt like days on one of the mean girls' kitchen counters, waiting to be picked up. My shoulder felt stuck, immobile--my collarbone was not yet determined to be broken, but would be within the next few hours.


That push was just the start of a series of pushes throughout my life--some negative like this, but others are positive, pushing me towards my goals.



***


Psychological experiences can be stuck in the body. Through somatic experience and support, you can overcome those obstacles.

Jessica, my mentor who is a teacher at the yoga studio, expressed insecurities about doing inversions such the forearm stand and suggested putting two blocks against the wall.The outermost block supports your back, almost like a palm on your back from someone who cares about you. This extinguishes the fear behind the seemingly impossible task. Her push towards greatness helped push me forward. With the help of the preparatory poses and my practice, I was able to do this pose that I never thought I would be able to do.


Preparatory poses for doing a pinca mayurasana:

- dolphin pose

- malasana

- bakasana (crow pose)




These poses build up the muscles that you need in order to achieve the forearm balance.


***


There are many benefits of doing a pinca mayurasana. It strengthens core, shoulders, and upper back. It opens your chest, which to me feels like the heart, and uplifts you both psychologically and physically. Furthermore, it strengthens balance and concentration, which can help with anxiety.


Yoga uses the physical to enhance the mental. My focus was pulled and mentor Jessica pushed me to attempt the forearm stand in yoga teacher training class. I was able to do that forearm stand, and this encourages me as I move on to teach yoga in how I may assist other yogis; I can pass on what I've learned through my own classes.


Dana's Word of the Day: Somatic (via Oxford Languages)

Somatic (adj.) relating to the body, especially as distinct from the mind






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